June 27, 2016

Being sick all weekend was no bueno. Well, let’s be honest.. sick since my birthday. I’m still a little congested and have a slight cough, but I feel overall better. Unfortunately, I missed dinner with Jackie and the Amp Live concert that I spent $50 on. Well, technically $25.

Tyler said he might be interested in figuring out how to make it work for the next year. I’m nervous and excited, but it’s also making me think about whether or not I truly want this. Or what I truly want.

My sister and mom gave conflicting advice. Cate said I should go for it if Tyler truly makes me happy. Mom said I should give him a year to get settled in his career because he’s still growing and developing.

I had never truly thought of a life without Blake. I don’t know if I can. When you’ve been with someone for nine years they become an integral part of who you are.

Buzzfeed: “It’s normal to be a little curious what it’d be like to be with someone else. But if you find yourself wondering if there is someone who is more reliable, sensitive, communicative, or whatever else than your partner, those fantasies might be highlighting the holes in your relationship.”

So how do I hurt someone that I’ve cared for for almost a decade? 😦

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